My apologies. Unconditional. Specifically to those who regularly visit my blog, no matter how blank the new-post page is. I know who you are because I regularly see your footprints on my dashboard, and it really means a lot to me.
And I will try that 2016 is better on my blog.
Talking about 2015, it wasn’t anything grand or successful. I didn’t win any lottery; I didn’t visit any new country; I didn’t get a fabulous raise in salary (though I did change the job); I didn’t find my better half. Instead, I grew as a person. No, one doesn’t grow overnight – especially when it’s about your emotions and wisdom.
I’m one of those few people who are born sad. We always feel unloved, we always feel unlucky, we always have problems fitting in. To top it off, when life deals us a harsh hand, that sadness go to unprecedented levels – bordering on maniac depression.
Usually, each year that we live, something happens in our life that add to our bucket of sadness. But this year, this wasn’t the case for me. Certain events happened near the end of 2015 that changed my entire perspective. And for a change, I’m just glad to be alive.
Without going into details, here’s the summary of how kind 2015 has been to me:
- Relocated to a new city with a new job. I’ve never ever left home before, unless it’s for vacations.
- Cockroaches used to scare the hell out of me. At home, if a cockroach is in the room, I’d just run out of the room and ask someone in the family to deal with it. When I saw a cockroach for the first time in the new home, I instinctively ran out of the house, and then realized who will deal with it if not I? So learnt dealing with them.
- Started living alone for the first time ever in life. Initial days were really tough, when all the horror movies that I’ve ever watched came back to haunt me. I dreaded looking under my bed.
- Learnt that I don't like to party when I don't have curfew. And to be honest, I’m quite surprised by this. I love to dance but really, it’s too much of pain to get ready and be a part of crowd so that you can dance for few minutes.
- Learnt I love my company (for God’s sake, it’s not the corporate one) the most. I love to sit in the garden, and observe the people the most. Or just read a novel in solitude.
- Learnt to make skin creams and wonderful skin oils. Still, I’ve to learn fancy creams and body butter. I look forward to those days when I will gift them to people I care about.
- Learnt baking: started with simple cakes and on Christmas Eve tried something fancy for the first time (Rum cake, which you would already know if you are friends with me on Facebook).
- Learnt that I love watching movies alone. I just love traveling alone to the theatre and watch the movie without any commentary. Also, I started downloading movies (just don’t ask me what I was doing until now).
- Took solo trips to many places but all of them were within the city. And in the process, discovered that I love visiting heritage sites.
- Learnt I still hate making bed and cleaning house. I mean, what’s the use of making a bed in the morning when you are anyway going to mess it up in the evening? And cleaning house just depresses me. I don’t know why but it simply does.
- Found love for jogging. As you might already know I’m quite lazy but jogging just makes me feel good.
- Learnt driving on highways. Until now, my family never allowed me to drive on highway as the truckdrivers are never kind to women. After lot of drama, my brother finally taught me and I drove more than 4,000 Kms across the states in 2015. So yay to me!
- Meet new people and learnt their stories. These are the incidents that left me full of jumbled thoughts and questions.
- Found love for new genres in books. Though romance is my first and last love, I’ve started loving psychological genre too.
- Made new wonderful friends: some in real life and some in virtual life, whom I look forward to meet in coming years.
Most of all, learnt to count my blessings. I may not have it all but I still have a family that loves me to death (and lets me do what I want to, no matter how difficult it's for them to understand); couple of friends whom I can call in the middle of the night if I want to cry with drama; a reasonable career; and a slice of content (it was the most difficult of all).
I don't have enough bank balance to travel far-off lands but maybe that's something for the future to take care of.
Thank you for reading me. It means a lot to me.