There’s a very famous proverb – “Where there’s a will,
there’s a way.” In simple words, it means that if you are determined to do
something, you will be able to do it. That’s good, isn’t it? Because if this
saying is true, I will be the most powerful woman on this earth whenever I wish
to be so. I just need to decide upon it and work toward it. That’s all good and
fine, but then what’s my problem? Or do I have a problem?
Oh yes, I do have a problem. In fact, my problem seems to be
growing day by day to gargantuan proportions. And the simple reason of my
problem is all the cheerfulness I see around me, whether I am at work or
socializing. If I am dissatisfied with my work and tell my boss that I need
something challenging, he/she will tell me that ingenuity lies in finding the
satisfaction and innovation in the existing work; that I should be
self-motivated enough to complete whatever I am given on my own without any
errors or delay. If I complain at home that I am dissatisfied about a certain
thing, my family rounds up to give me a list of things that I have and others
don’t have. By others they mean the poor people who don’t have enough clothes
to wear, enough food to eat and a shelter to rest in peace.
Even my life on Facebook is not free from such cheerfulness.
Every time I log in to see what my Facebook friends are up to, I can just see
famous quotes on positivity, and advises on how a one should handle his/her
life. The advices range from how God has decided good things for us and how we
shouldn’t get depressed by the minuscule failures, to how people around us are
so divine and saintly that we should practically worship them, to how love
always conquers it all, including terrorism and greed.
Mind you, I am neither a bleak person nor suicidal. I too
love jokes and I do appreciate whatever the God (if he/she truly exists, that
is) has given me like any other normal person; but that doesn’t make me blind
to other problems in my life. Being happy with my project at work doesn’t stop
me from trying to get a better project for the next time around. Being happy in
my personal life doesn’t stop me from questioning the unacceptable behavior of
my family members and relatives around me. And the most important thing of all,
being happy doesn’t compel me to dish out positivity quotes and goody-goody
advises to all the people who are unfortunate enough to be around me at the
time.
Another thing I can’t fathom about this cheerfulness around
me is if everybody is so happy, spiritual and content the way their life is
shaping, why do they whine about their problems when they get an opportunity to
do so? Why do they snub the weaker person around them if they are so saintly?
Why do they want to poke their nose in other’s business when they are so much
fulfilled with whatever they have? And why do we have so many lifestyle
diseases if everyone knows how to combat stress and how to achieve whatever
they want?
The other day when I saw the new Bournville advertisement, I
couldn’t stop laughing. I could absolutely relate to it that too much
sweetness, especially the fake one, is not good for your health. I firmly
believe that the journey of life gives you the glimpses of good as well as bad.
You cannot get whatever you want no matter how determined you are because there
are circumstances and other people involved in your life, and you have to learn
to accept it with a smile. Be a loser but a graceful one; don’t start
pretending that life is a garden of roses and that you have a right to dispense
advices to each and every person you meet. Everyone has their own way to
dealing with their life, let them do it. If they need advice, they will come to
you if they think you are the right person to approach. Until then, live and
let others live.
Photo Courtesy: www.inven.co.kr
Well written..as they say "Kabhi kissi ko mukkummal jahan nahin milta" but that doesn't mean you can't be upset about things!!
ReplyDeleteYes no one has a perfect life but please don't take away my right to sulk!!
PS: Image is Eerie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sfurti, I absolutely feel like this joker when people around me carry on with their fake cheerfulness. Thanks :)
DeleteI can totally relate to this. All those earnest “inspirational” quotes/pics or invocation to relax/be humble/count your blessings/be positive etc on FB.. It’s a bummer.
ReplyDeleteIt absolutely infuriates me when people give me "advice" unsolicited :(
Haha...I feel good when I find like-minded people :)
DeleteI am reminded of Abe Lincoln's quote, “I laugh because I must not cry, that is all, that is all. ”People fake cheerfulness because they are too scared to admit that they are dissatisfied with their lives. But sometimes, it is nice to let go and sulk, cry and scream for a while.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely agree, Khushboo. I seriously don't get it what's wrong with being sad or dissatisfied with what you have got? Why so much fuss about being positive and saintly?
DeleteUnwanted advice is due to overflow of recently learnt and appreciated knowledge( and never self-applied) hence you never know .. anyone can give it to you .. :D In India its virus everyone effected with.
ReplyDeleteGyaan sirf FB pe likhne ko.. subordinates,friends and family members ko dene ko hota hai ... khud pe koi apply nahi karta :D mere dost ye humare desh ki sabse badi hypocrisy culture hai.Unwanted Gyan !!
and now the first thing last- Indeed where there is will.. there is way but willingness needs goal .. if there is no place to go ..talking about a journey is absurd ;)
Loved your experiences dear friend :)
Haha...I do remember your hair tale ;)
DeleteThere is a saying.."Gyan baatne se badhta hai"..So,I guess everyone is trying to do that..But it really irritates me when someone advice on issues in my life..I mean there is no way that he knows my problem better than me...
ReplyDeleteGreat Post..Loved reading it. :-)
"Gyan baatne se badhta hai" LOL...never thought that way. :D BTW, thanks. When somebody offers me unsolicited advice, it bogs me off too.
DeleteThe only thing we Indians are good at is giving advise (even when not necessary).
ReplyDeleteVery true Vijay!
DeleteI must confess that I am in love with one of those Bournville ladies. Anyway. Yes, you are correct. Things are not as they are..and I have never understood the theory of 'contentment'.
ReplyDeleteI think it's natural to be depressed at times but don't know why everybody has such a huge problem accepting it. Anyway, thanks for visiting :D
DeleteNice post! In most cases (that's what I personally feel) pple are just feigning cheerfulness but are quite sad and insecure inside. I too loved that B Chocolate ad! mew mew mew mew!! lolzzzz!!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I too think so but the question is, what's the point in pretending? Isn't it too much of work? If you are sad about something, you are sad. What's the big deal in that?
DeleteAlso, glad that somebody too likes the ad. BTW, I want that plant around when somebody is going all sweetness on me ;)
Good idea, then plz give one sapling to me too! ;)
ReplyDeleteHaha...sure. I will remember you if I get one. :D
DeleteInteresting and very well written. I enjoy swimming with the flow downstream :)
ReplyDeleteHaha...thanks Jahid.
DeleteLovely post. Straight from the heart and no holds barred.
ReplyDeletePeople fake cheerfulness because they have been drilled to do so. "Fake it till you make it."
I love the bourneville ad too and am so relieved when the man eating plant removes the over sweet annoying lady.
LOL...BTW, I am looking for that plant :P
DeleteThere is such an emotional depth in most of your posts I read! Keep it going...I have been through a similar charade...During my hard times I was trying to get over my pain and agony,but only my friends and family were the ones,who made i diffifuclt for me...If I would be happy,they would be surprised,some even jealous...how can you be happy when such a thing has happened...you should talk about it..I am all ears...II mean what did they expect?That I should keep crying my heart out for months...They actually liked it when I did so...Duh! A companion is always a good listener without judging you...
ReplyDeleteThere is such an emotional depth in most of your posts I read! Keep it going...I have been through a similar charade...During my hard times I was trying to get over my pain and agony,but only my friends and family were the ones,who made i diffifuclt for me...If I would be happy,they would be surprised,some even jealous...how can you be happy when such a thing has happened...you should talk about it..I am all ears...II mean what did they expect?That I should keep crying my heart out for months...They actually liked it when I did so...Duh! A companion is always a good listener without judging you...
ReplyDeleteReally thanks. I know what you mean. But this is our society. You are always on your own. Nobody is yours, and you always learn this lesson the hard way :( Anyway, thanks for reading my posts :)
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